[Ren is minding his own business, thank you very much, when SYNTHIA's prompt pops up right in front of his face and he's forced to stop outside the cafeteria (maybe actually blocking the way into the cafeteria). He looks between it and the designated complimentee and it's only a really good pokerface that keeps him from grimacing.
It just had to be the cop.
The prompt continues to loom. Is it getting closer? He leans back a little, hands still in his pockets, like that will actually increase the distance between him and the prompt and handcuff guy.]
Give me a minute.
[There is no clarification if he's talking to SYNTHIA or Wriothesley.]
[ After a month of dipping in and out of the cafeteria, Wriothesley's gotten used to the questionable meals sometimes served there. It's no worse than the stuff they serve in the Fortress, but spend enough time at the top, with everyone willing to bend to every suggestion and request, it ends up being something of a shock when you're dragged back down to the bottom to start all over again.
At least being demoted down to Just Another Guy means that he's more amenable to conversing and shooting the shit with his fellow LILITH colleagues, though there's plenty of faces he's still only seen in passing. Like this kid, inconveniently blocking the walkway to the cafeteria. Hello? His lunch???
He blinks once, vaguely puzzled. ]
Do you need something?
[ And can he help with it in order to speed things along so he can eat?? ]
[Ren holds up one (1) finger because he really was serious about needing a minute. He squints at Wriothesley before staring determinedly at the empty air past his head, though if the way his eyes light up are any indication, it's because...he's using the network and reading this guy's profile. Yeah.
About sixty seconds later, this is oh-so-graciously deposited in Wriothesley's inbox from @joker (yes, Ren copy-pasted the hair from a picture he just took while standing in the cafeteria door). He checks SYNTHIA's prompt. This qualifies, right?]
...Well, it was worth a shot.
[Like hell that was going to work. He gives the guy another once over.]
Congratulations on [his 'do really does look like ears] having hair.
[Still not good enough. Ugh.]
i'm so sorry, i've cursed the game into learning his name
[ this whole tag is absolutely taking me out, thank you
?? Hello????
But sure, okay, he'll just...........stand there, the confusion on his face growing deeper with each passing second. At the 30 second mark he wonders if this guy's managed to fall asleep standing up, and at the 60 second mark he—oh hold up, he has a new message?
........A very confusing message that he spends 45 seconds trying to parse to no success. He is...a dog?? A very buff dog with hair? But he is also a crying dog with hair? It doesn't help that now he's being complimented on having hair, period???
The creases between his brows deepen even further. ]
Thanks. I think.
[ He is so disturbed right now. ]
Were you the one that sent that message? [ Or was it just a beautiful coincidence........... ]
Edited (HELLO what happened there) 2024-01-31 15:52 (UTC)
[He got a thank you, so that should count??? But no, the prompt remains.
Ren irritably pushes his glasses back up his nose.
There is a very long second where he debates the merits of trolling this guy, which mostly has him weighing effort versus shitpost, and in the end he decides to just send Wriothesley several huge emoji (in Ren's defense, Yuwon did this to him first).
i know this is busted in email but it works on actual dw, so i will spare us from further #crimes 🐕💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩 I am really sorry.]
First indecipherable dog memes, then cryptic comments regarding his hair, and now..........gigantic poop emoji? And why are there alarms surrounding the poop? Is this supposed to represent some sort of crime? Truly the future is unfathomable. Take him back to 1800s fantasy Fr*nce.
Ren's irritability is mirrored in the scrunch of Wriothesley's face as he tries to figure out which problem here to tackle first. ]
So that one wasn't you either.
[ He'd like to believe that this kid is innocent and just caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, but too much time spent around Han Sooyoung has left him wary when it comes to stuff like this. Well. Alright then. ]
In that case, I'll be taking my leave.
[ To get his LUNCH, which he has suddenly remembered. ]
[Ren lets him take his leave, but this prompt is still annoyingly hanging in front of his face and will not go away, so Wriothesley gets an impromptu hanger-on.
Yes, Ren is literally following him and if given any indication he needs to explain himself (because. because he won't explain himself without reason in some mindless act of rebellion), he just gives Wriothesley the most deadpan of looks.]
I need to figure out a compliment that works.
[He needs to be sincere.
This sucks. He also just ate so there's not even a reason for him to be in the cafeteria anymore.]
Wriothesley makes it about 15 feet before the addition of his strange shadow bothers him enough for him to stop and turn back around. Sorry to anyone else who wanted to eat today, because now there are two men clogging up the entryway instead of just one. ]
You were trying to compliment me....by congratulating me on having hair?
[ Seriously? Who does that? He lifts one hand, palm facing upwards. ]
You could have at least complimented me on my stunning good looks.
[ That's half-sarcastic and half-real, because he has enough confidence (perhaps a little too much confidence??) to know that he's not half bad looking. ]
[Ren takes a moment to study him, like he's really taking that suggestion to heart—and then, expression completely flat, says,]
No way would that work.
[Why is he making this so much harder for himself (stubbornness and some misplaced sense of pride). It's not like it would be hard for him to give most Outsiders a compliment on their appearance and mean it!!!]
What kind of person just walks around with handcuffs all the time?
[ What's wrong with handcuffs?? Though the abrupt mention of them does have his gaze darting down to where his self-acquired handcuffs are just casually dangling off his belt, because why not.
But if he finds the question insulting at all, he doesn't show it. Whatever vague irritation's sprinkled throughout his expression is entirely due to this strange kid who apparently has some kind of bone to pick with him. (But hey, at least the spam emoji messages have stopped.) ]
Someone who likes to be prepared.
[ Prepared for what?? Stay tuned. ]
I don't recall reading any rules regarding the types of accessories we can carry around on base. [ Because handcuffs are totally a normal everyday accesory....... ]
[Ren's own expression is guarded, except for the antagonistic look in his eyes (though the glasses take the edge off).
In his mind, there are two types of people who would just walk around with handcuffs on their person at all times. One is equivalent to the type of jackass who has arrested him. The other is like...Kamoshida. He would believe Kamoshida would get off on doing that kind of shit. Fuckin' RIP.]
Wouldn't know if there were any. [ 😒 ] I'm not a cop.
[He crosses his arms.
On one hand, he can admit he's just being petty with some guy he doesn't know. On the other, still sorry not sorry.]
[ Is this the problem? His apparent affiliation with law enforcement? Ren crosses his arms in front of his chest, and Wriothesley lowers his hands so they settle on his hips. Guess they really are going to have this conversation here, in the half-full cafeteria. ]
I hate to disappoint you then, but neither am I.
[ Which sounds all fine and dandy on paper, except for the part where he has no concept of the thoughts running through Ren's mind right now and has probably just dug his own grave by self-identifying as a pervert. ]
I'm not here to arrest you, or anyone else, for breaking the law. [ That'd never been his job anyway except in special circumstances. ] Not that I'd even have the jurisdiction to do that here if I wanted.
[ More importantly. His lips thin a little. ]
Don't they teach kids in school these days not to judge a book by its cover?
At least it's never been about if Wriothesley could arrest him or not; Ren rolls his eyes a little at the suggestion, like yeah, I'd like to see you try, in true brazen teenage "I only got caught because I had to" fashion.
He's just being a hater.]
Ok, pervert.
[Well, at least it's out there now. For better or worse.]
Someone literally said you worked at a prison.
[Ren isn't the type to just buy into rumors, given the course of his life but like. That sounded pretty legit.]
[ The only bright spot in all of this is that Wriothesley's spent so much time around Han Sooyoung (usually against his will) that the casual insult barely fazes him. He'll take being called a pervert over being called a bottom again. ]
I did. [ At least he's honest about that. ] Is everyone who works in a prison automatically considered a villain in your eyes?
[ Where is the line here, he wants to find it so bad. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
get_along_shirt.jpg sorry this is going to be really dumb
It just had to be the cop.
The prompt continues to loom. Is it getting closer? He leans back a little, hands still in his pockets, like that will actually increase the distance between him and the prompt and handcuff guy.]
Give me a minute.
[There is no clarification if he's talking to SYNTHIA or Wriothesley.]
good thing i love stupidity
At least being demoted down to Just Another Guy means that he's more amenable to conversing and shooting the shit with his fellow LILITH colleagues, though there's plenty of faces he's still only seen in passing. Like this kid, inconveniently blocking the walkway to the cafeteria. Hello? His lunch???
He blinks once, vaguely puzzled. ]
Do you need something?
[ And can he help with it in order to speed things along so he can eat?? ]
i am getting so good at spelling wrio the sley
About sixty seconds later, this is oh-so-graciously deposited in Wriothesley's inbox from @joker (yes, Ren copy-pasted the hair from a picture he just took while standing in the cafeteria door). He checks SYNTHIA's prompt. This qualifies, right?]
...Well, it was worth a shot.
[Like hell that was going to work. He gives the guy another once over.]
Congratulations on [his 'do really does look like ears] having hair.
[Still not good enough. Ugh.]
i'm so sorry, i've cursed the game into learning his name
?? Hello????
But sure, okay, he'll just...........stand there, the confusion on his face growing deeper with each passing second. At the 30 second mark he wonders if this guy's managed to fall asleep standing up, and at the 60 second mark he—oh hold up, he has a new message?
........A very confusing message that he spends 45 seconds trying to parse to no success. He is...a dog?? A very buff dog with hair? But he is also a crying dog with hair? It doesn't help that now he's being complimented on having hair, period???
The creases between his brows deepen even further. ]
Thanks. I think.
[ He is so disturbed right now. ]
Were you the one that sent that message? [ Or was it just a beautiful coincidence........... ]
slay wrio slay (cw: huge emoji)
[He got a thank you, so that should count??? But no, the prompt remains.
Ren irritably pushes his glasses back up his nose.
There is a very long second where he debates the merits of trolling this guy, which mostly has him weighing effort versus shitpost, and in the end he decides to just send Wriothesley several huge emoji (in Ren's defense, Yuwon did this to him first).
i know this is busted in email but it works on actual dw, so i will spare us from further #crimes
🐕💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩🚨💩
I am really sorry.]
What message?
[ 😐 ]
no subject
First indecipherable dog memes, then cryptic comments regarding his hair, and now..........gigantic poop emoji? And why are there alarms surrounding the poop? Is this supposed to represent some sort of crime? Truly the future is unfathomable. Take him back to 1800s fantasy Fr*nce.
Ren's irritability is mirrored in the scrunch of Wriothesley's face as he tries to figure out which problem here to tackle first. ]
So that one wasn't you either.
[ He'd like to believe that this kid is innocent and just caught in the wrong place at the wrong time, but too much time spent around Han Sooyoung has left him wary when it comes to stuff like this. Well. Alright then. ]
In that case, I'll be taking my leave.
[ To get his LUNCH, which he has suddenly remembered. ]
no subject
[Ren lets him take his leave, but this prompt is still annoyingly hanging in front of his face and will not go away, so Wriothesley gets an impromptu hanger-on.
Yes, Ren is literally following him and if given any indication he needs to explain himself (because. because he won't explain himself without reason in some mindless act of rebellion), he just gives Wriothesley the most deadpan of looks.]
I need to figure out a compliment that works.
[He needs to be sincere.
This sucks. He also just ate so there's not even a reason for him to be in the cafeteria anymore.]
no subject
Wriothesley makes it about 15 feet before the addition of his strange shadow bothers him enough for him to stop and turn back around. Sorry to anyone else who wanted to eat today, because now there are two men clogging up the entryway instead of just one. ]
You were trying to compliment me....by congratulating me on having hair?
[ Seriously? Who does that? He lifts one hand, palm facing upwards. ]
You could have at least complimented me on my stunning good looks.
[ That's half-sarcastic and half-real, because he has enough confidence (perhaps a little too much confidence??) to know that he's not half bad looking. ]
no subject
No way would that work.
[Why is he making this so much harder for himself (stubbornness and some misplaced sense of pride). It's not like it would be hard for him to give most Outsiders a compliment on their appearance and mean it!!!]
What kind of person just walks around with handcuffs all the time?
[ACAB. Sorry, Makoto.]
no subject
But if he finds the question insulting at all, he doesn't show it. Whatever vague irritation's sprinkled throughout his expression is entirely due to this strange kid who apparently has some kind of bone to pick with him. (But hey, at least the spam emoji messages have stopped.) ]
Someone who likes to be prepared.
[ Prepared for what?? Stay tuned. ]
I don't recall reading any rules regarding the types of accessories we can carry around on base. [ Because handcuffs are totally a normal everyday accesory....... ]
no subject
In his mind, there are two types of people who would just walk around with handcuffs on their person at all times. One is equivalent to the type of jackass who has arrested him. The other is like...Kamoshida. He would believe Kamoshida would get off on doing that kind of shit. Fuckin' RIP.]
Wouldn't know if there were any. [ 😒 ] I'm not a cop.
[He crosses his arms.
On one hand, he can admit he's just being petty with some guy he doesn't know. On the other, still sorry not sorry.]
no subject
I hate to disappoint you then, but neither am I.
[ Which sounds all fine and dandy on paper, except for the part where he has no concept of the thoughts running through Ren's mind right now and has probably just dug his own grave by self-identifying as a pervert. ]
I'm not here to arrest you, or anyone else, for breaking the law. [ That'd never been his job anyway except in special circumstances. ] Not that I'd even have the jurisdiction to do that here if I wanted.
[ More importantly. His lips thin a little. ]
Don't they teach kids in school these days not to judge a book by its cover?
[ Or a person by their....handcuffs...... ]
no subject
At least it's never been about if Wriothesley could arrest him or not; Ren rolls his eyes a little at the suggestion, like yeah, I'd like to see you try, in true brazen teenage "I only got caught because I had to" fashion.
He's just being a hater.]
Ok, pervert.
[Well, at least it's out there now. For better or worse.]
Someone literally said you worked at a prison.
[Ren isn't the type to just buy into rumors, given the course of his life but like. That sounded pretty legit.]
no subject
I did. [ At least he's honest about that. ] Is everyone who works in a prison automatically considered a villain in your eyes?
[ Where is the line here, he wants to find it so bad. ]